


Dear Jean-Luc

by andnowsomeonenew



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Angst, F/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-19
Updated: 2014-06-19
Packaged: 2018-02-05 09:05:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1812880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andnowsomeonenew/pseuds/andnowsomeonenew
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beverly realises she has lost.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Jean-Luc

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda OOC and extreme

_Dear Jean-Luc,_

_My dear Jean Luc, I am sitting here watching you have dinner with her-Nella Darren. You're laughing with her and you keep holding her hand. Do you realise how much I want that to be me that makes you so happy. You truly are happy aren't you? The day she transferred back onto the ship I have never seen you smile so much. Barely 5 weeks before I had heard you tell me that you'd loved me for 25 years-yes I know you were lying when you said those feelings had gone. I never should have left you that night-I wanted to stay so badly but I was scared. Scared by how much I loved you, by how easily you could hurt me-I'd already lost one man I love to Starfleet; I couldn't stand to lose another, not you. But when Wes left I realised that I needed to seize life by the horns-after all you never know when everything might change. So I made up my mind-I would ask you to dinner and tell you how much I love you. How you are my first thought when I wake up, my last before I go to sleep, how everything I do I do for you. You're the shining beacon that keeps me going. I know it all sounds cliché but that is truly how I feel. I went to breakfast the next morning having spent the entire night before building up the courage to actually ask you out. Do you know what I found that morning? You weren't answering your chime so I let myself in to check you were ok-you were having sex with Nella-I didn't even know she was on the ship! I decided to sit back and wait for your relationship to end but it didn't. Within 3 weeks she had been transferred back to the ship and you were ecstatic. Yet still I believed we could have a chance. But know I hear you're engaged to her, you avoid me, Deanna can't look me in the eye and Nella is happier than ever so it must me true. I accept defeat. She's won. Once again I lose. I've lost my parents, Jack, Nana, Wesley, Deanna doesn't need me now she's already got a sister and now I've lost you too and it's my own fault. I can't live like this any longer. I'm sorry but I have to go. Goodbye Jean-Luc, I love you more than you could ever imagine. I wish you a lifetime of happiness with Nella and it breaks my heart that I'll never see you again. Goodbye my love, my soul mate, my best friend. Tell the others I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye to them._

_All of my love,_

_Beverly xxx_

Jean-Luc sobbed as he read this. He looked down at the lifeless body in his arms 'Oh Beverly, my eternal love. It was always you. Yes I slept with Nella but it was a one-off, the only reason I was holding her hand today is because she was telling me about when her husband died and she needed comforting. The transfer was purely coincidental. You were always my everything, my universe and more. This world wasn't meant for us. So I'll see you in the next one.' He picked up the phaser which had earlier drained the life from his beloved, 'I'm coming to get you my love.' He pulled the trigger and silence once again reigned over the quarter.


End file.
